A Myth by the Wild and Wacky Dave Barnes
Ed Cash. At these words the ground shudders. Trees lose their leaves. Seasons change. Backbeats begin.
Ed was born twins. He sang before he talked, he danced before he walked. He talked in key. When he hummed, birds flocked. He was a child. He was a gift. He was a melody. Even at 2 years old, he never fought, believing that any problems he had with anyone could be solved either by a Chocolate Milk drinking contest (which he always won) or a "name this Led Zepplin lyric" contest (he lost once. To Robert Plant) Sports were not something Ed enjoyed. At 4, he was quoted as saying "the manipulation of the body holds no real challenge for me. But music, the great sport that floats between our hearts and minds, our ears and mouth, THAT is a challenge." He started playing everything you could strike or strum. Nolan Ryan took to pitching. Tony Hawk took to skating. Music took to Ed Cash. He was in bands, or i should say, bands were in him. He wrote songs that made plants cry. His lyrics, even at 7 years old, were trilingual. Dictionaries were always present at shows. As were professors and archeologists.
Most of his teenage years are a blur. It is said that he was spotted traveling the globe. Martin Handford, the author of Where's Waldo, attributes the idea of his books to Ed. They were sitting in an empty soccer stadium in Rennes, France where they struck up a conversation that lasted 3 days. Ed told Martin his story. Martin wrote about it. Seeking anonymity, Ed begged him not to use his name. He lived in Argentina, loved in Germany, worked in Japan, got lost in Greenland and ended up in Mongolia where he started the sport Ragger, which involves 37 players, 3 fields, a t-shirts worth of cotton, and 9 goals. It's still the most frequently played sport there to this day. (Even Barack Obama sprained an ankle playing during his trip in 1988). After becoming a star in Spain by acting in numerous car commercials, Ed finally came home.
College tried it's hand at Ed, but the road and stage called in the key that only Ed could hear, and he responded in tune. His shows became the stuff of legends. Venues were built in hopes that Ed would play them. Bands were formed in hopes that Ed would front them. Guitars were made....You get the point. He opened for himself, was fired, then hired back as simply ED. He had 285 top 10 hits during that time in Thailand. "Ed-ding it" in Thailand still means to do something very very well. Michael Jackson, in an interview during that time, said that one night during a night off in Baltimore, he saw ED's show and after finishing crying, wrote and recorded the entirety of the Dangerous album. If one rearranges the letters on the cover of Dangerous, one gets - ED RAN GO US.
Charlotte became Ed's place of residence, though the mayor tried many to change the name of the town to Edstown. Ed, in his humility, begged him not to, settling for a new subdivision to be called Ed's Corner. They sold out of lots in seconds. From an aerial view, one can tell that the shape of the subdivision is Ed's profile. He produced a slew of records during his stay, most of them selling well into the thousands, all of them were certified Aluminum. After realizing that his talent needed wide open spaces, spaces he had found in Nashville, he moved. The day he moved began a rain that lasted for a month and a half. It's said that God doesn't cry, but the sky sure did.
He now resides in Nashville where he has continued his musical contributions. The GMA has tried to rename the association to GMECWARTG - Gospel Music Ed Cash Writes And Records, Thank Goodness. Humility won out again. He has become more and more of a recluse, having a hard time going out in public. "To be assailed by droves of people is one thing. But when children recognize you, it's hard to go anywhere. to do anything."
If you are ever in Nashville and see a rainbow, it's simply the sign that Ed has finished another song.